Size is just a number!

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Weight is something I struggle with a lot. If you are a regular reader of my blog, or even just my social media, you'll know my relationship with food and my weight is a constant battle and I have good days and bad days and some really bad days. 

Recently, I've been losing weight. As always, it's been fluctuating a lot but I've been losing, and any loss is a loss which is obviously way better than a gain in my case. However, while I haven't noticed much weight change myself, other people have been commenting over the last few weeks over my weight loss and change in body shape, which has obviously made me feel far happier with myself and a lot more confident. 

Which is why today, I wanted to talk to you guys about clothes. More specifically, the sizes of clothes. 

I can confidently say I am a size 12. On good days, I am a size 10. On bad days (aka when I'm in H & M) I can sometimes be a 14. *Note I say bad day: bad for me as that's bigger than my usual size. There is nothing wrong with being a size 14 at all!* But in the last few years I've found shopping such a struggle. I can no longer say that I'm a solid size 12 because my size genuinely varies so much from shop to shop. I used to be able to go into a shop, pick up my size, know it would fit and buy it. Now I have to try on three sizes and find that one is too small and one is too big and one fits my waist but not my bum or whatever. Shopping is impossible. 

This really stops me from wanting to shop, particularly if I'm looking to buy fitted items, such as a bodycon dress. I don't want to have to buy a size bigger when I know I'm not! I want to be able to buy my size, even a size smaller when I know I've been losing weight! Is that really too much to ask? 

And then it dawned on me. 

Why the heck does it matter? Why the heck do I care? 

Let me share a few secrets with you. 

A while ago, I did a fashion shoot for my blog, a haul of all my Autumn clothes. And I'm not gonna lie when I say I know I look pretty damn good in the photos- not because I'm just feelin' myself but also because a lot of people gave me a lot of compliments; this doesn't normally happen and so I know these photo's were good! So here, I think I look pretty good, body shape is looking pretty on point. The body suit? A size 10. The jeans? A size 14. What a contrast is that? 

This outfit? The jeans are a size 12. The shirt is a petite size 10. The gillet is also a size 10. 

Bear with me because the extremes keep coming. 

This photo slaaaaaaays, right? This was the one you guys loved the most! Well guess what? That top is a size 10. That skirt? That gorgeous, lovely leather skirt that I look so sassy in? That's a size 16. Yep, you read that. A size 16. It's from Boohoo's plus sized section. Plus sized

I know I'm not fat. My belly isn't flat, it's got a little flabby pooch on the front of it, but I'm not fat, I'm not a 16 and I'm definitely not what people would consider plus sized; the fact that I'm wearing a Boohoo top and skirt in a size 10 and a size 16 says it all, I feel. You can't be one size anymore! 

I nearly didn't buy a leather skirt this year. I was having such a hard time finding one that would fit over my hips, as leather isn't a very generous fabric! I could just about squeeze into a size 14 and I was like no. I refuse to buy a 16 when I know I am a 12! 

And then it dawned on me. It really doesn't fucking matter, does it? Who the hell is going to know what size this skirt is? (Well, you all will now...). No one is going to look at the label, no one is going to point and stare and say "Ugh, she's wearing a size 16 and she's meant to be wearing a 12!". No one even needs to know my size! 

There is nothing wrong with wearing a 16. There is nothing wrong with wearing a 12. There is something wrong with body shaming, which has happened to me enough to make me feel embarrassed about my clothing sizes. At the end of the day though, who cares? If you like how you look and if you feel good in what you're wearing, who the hell cares? 

I can now squeeze into some size 8 items. I can fit size 10. I can comfortably wear size 12, and even 14's. And if I'm shopping for something in a not-very-generous fabric like leather, fuck it, I have to try a 16. 

I am pretty happy with how I look. I'm happy with how I dress. I like my style. 

If the size of an item bothers you that much, cut the label out. Don't let the number on the label stop you from buying something because honestly, the sizes vary so much from shop to shop and you're never going to be the same size everywhere. Don't be disheartened if you find you have to go a size or two up. Celebrate if you can get into a size smaller! But don't ever feel ashamed about the size you're having to buy if you love how you look. Size is really just a number. 

Love from,
Florence Grace

Keep hold of the past

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I feel like I've blogged about a very similar topic to this before, but today I wanted to talk about the importance of looking back.

The past isn't always a happy place, there is absolutely no denying back. It can be filled with regret, mistakes, misery, unhappiness. Alternatively, it can be filled with happiness and joy and love. Either way though, its unhealthy to live in the past and a lot of people don't like to look back on most of it. However, for some things, it can be important to look back on your life and make comparisons to where you are now. 

Today, I was emptying a drawer of mine and I found the first, second and third issues of my magazine, Love from... . I looked at the first issue and I burst out laughing! Compared to the second issue it looked like a primary school project, and compared to the issue out now...well. There is no comparison. But for a moment, I really sat and reflected on the last two years of my life, particularly on my career. Without looking backwards on my career, I wouldn't be able to see how far forwards I had moved, and so for that reason, I really valued being able to reflect. 

I have also been taking the time to reflect on how I have evolved as a person this year. This time last year, I feel like I was totally different. I don't know if the change has been visible to other people, but I feel that both physically and mentally there have been a lot of changes- and these changes would not have been recognised by myself if I hadn't been able to look back on my past and make comparisons to where I am now. 

Now, there are some things in my past I'd like to totally forget, and I'm sure you have some things you wish you could wipe from your mind too- that is totally fine, of course it is! But don't wipe your past out completely. Whether you like to believe it or not, your past does contribute to the person you are today- and sometimes you need to look back on your past to appreciate the changes you've made or to see where it all went wrong and learn how to fix it. 

The past can be a lesson and a blessing. It can definitely form a better future for yourself, it you learn from it properly. 

Love from,
Florence Grace 

The Sex Museum


My recent trip to Amsterdam was actually my fourth visit there, and yet until this latest trip I had never been to the infamous Sex Museum. However, it was my sisters first time to the city and we wanted to do as many tourist-y things as possible, and visiting this museum was one of them. 

Now I'm not going to lie, I thought the museum would just be one big joke. I knew from friends visits that there were giant penis' inside that made for hilarious photos, and other outrageous models and such that were hilarious to take photo's of. So I thought this would be the same throughout the entire museum; a bit of a laugh, a bit of a joke.

How wrong was I! Admittedly, the first floor of the museum was quite funny, filled with humorous moving models that flashed you, 'peed' in your face, were performing sexual acts on each other and so in. It made me and my sister giggle, that's for sure. However, as we progressed to the second ad third floor of the museum, the tone of the museum totally changed. It was actually incredibly educational and informative- really!

The thing that got me and my sister most was the 'private' photographs that had been donated to the museum. These pornographic photographs were from as late as the 90's, which we expected, and they demonstrated couples, both homosexual and heterosexual, performing sexual acts on each other. I don't think I need to describe to you what the photo's were like- I'm sure you can imagine! 

What shocked us was how far back the photo's went. It might sound naive or stupid but I never thought of sex being "fun" until the 50's. Before then, I believed that sex was just for reproducing, you know? How wrong was I! The pornographic photo's went back to the beginning of the 1800's. And when I say they were pornographic, I don't just mean posing naked. I mean that they were using things like stocks to pin each other down and whipping each other with cat o' nine tails and brooms, getting into positions I haven't even seen in modern day porn, I swear to God! There was even a classic porn scene being captured, of teacher and student! It was truly incredible and I had no idea such exciting sex had existed as far back as the 1800's. 

I was stunned. When we speak of the Victorian times, we speak of women being seen and not heard. We hear all about the fact that women didn't have equal rights- and the fact that feminism basically didn't exist. But we definitely don't hear about how sexually liberated *some* of the women were. Visiting the museum and seeing these real life photo's was a genuine eye opener, and I couldn't believe I had been so naive up until now. 

The other thing I loved about the personal photo collection was seeing how women's bodies had changed throughout porn. I genuinely couldn't believe my eyes. In the beginning, in the 1800's and the start of the 1900's, women had bellies! And I'm not talking a size 10/12, lil' bit chubby (you know, Boohoo's idea of plus sized) I'm talking big bellies. Flab. Rolls and folds on the tummy. And they stood there, sexually confident. They looked sexy. They were attractive. I loved it. What I loved was that there was also skinny women too. Sometimes the skinny and large women were featured together, and it just looked great. It worked. It showed a real portrayal of women in sex. 

What I didn't love was watching how the women changed throughout the photographs. By the 1950's, women in the mainstream media and in these photographs weren't 'fat' anymore, they were more curvy (think Marilyn Monroe, and slightly bigger) but their stomachs were mostly flatter than in previous years, and everyone featured was pretty much the same shape. By the 1990's, the women were all stick thin, like Kate Moss. No flab, no rolls, no curves. Just thin, slender women. And yes, they were still gorgeous, they still looked sexually confident, they still looked fabulous! But I just couldn't believe what a drastic change I was seeing before my very eyes, with the variety of body shapes dwindling down to just one standard body; size 6. 

If 'fat' women were once perceived as sexy and attractive, why aren't they still perceived the same way today? When did this shift happen, and why? It just doesn't seem right. Again, it's probably naive of me but I always assumed models were thin the way they are today. I had no idea that 'fat' people were used as much as thin women are today, if not more. It baffled me and it made me sad about the women we see in mainstream media today. 

Overall, the trip to the Sex Museum was really educational for me. It gave me an insight into the sexual history of women to as far back as the 1800's and opened up my eyes to just how extreme the changes to women's bodies have been. I hope one day we will go back to having more diverse bodies being perceived in the media as sexy and attractive; we need a little more diversity and there is certainly room for it. What do you think?

Love from,
Florence Grace 

Should I have gone to uni?


The other day, I was talking to my mum about how much I loved my best girl Bobbie's university friends, and how I envied her for having so many loving, caring friends around her- she is so lucky! I was whining to my mum about the size of my social circle (online friends, a gazillion, real life friends, two), and she asked me:

"Do you wish you'd gone to uni now?"

I said no, straight away. No, no, no. Not going to university has actually been hugely beneficial to me and my career. Most of the people in the same year group as me are now in their final year of uni. In the time that they have been studying, I have been working; I've been a radio presenter, trained to be a TV presenter, started my own magazine, worked with Channel 4 and 4Music, landed several jobs within the media industry...I doubt I would have done half of that, if any of it, whilst at university. 

But are there times when I think "Man, this would be so much easier if I'd gone to uni?". 

Of course. 

At university, I could have gained more independence for myself- but I've done that this year anyway, learning to cook, and even doing some washing myself the other day (go me!) (don't kill me for never having used a washing machine before).

At university, I could have been involved with the student radio, newspaper or magazine- but here I'm involved with larger print publications and with 4Music. 

At university, I could have had another three years to figure my life out, rather than stressing from the age of 18- but I got a head start and started to pave the way for myself three years ahead of people I know by not going. 

So yes, there would be some pros if I had gone to university. But I don't doubt my decision for a second. The last three years have been amazing for me- I went to college and gained a qualification while making new friends, for free might I add, I launched my own business and have begun developing my media profile and making a name for myself within the industry. I didn't need university for any of that. I did it all by my damn self. 

Should I have gone to university? Maybe. But I'm so glad I didn't. 

Love from,
Florence Grace

My favourite YouTubers!


I love to binge watch YouTube! I can start watching with the intention of only looking at one video, and then suddenly I'm in deep, finding new vloggers and channels, watching weird videos...I don't know how, it just happens! Of course, I love the big ones like the Saccone-Joly's (I watch them every day without fail!) and Louise Pentland (formerly Sprinkle of Glitter) but there are some other, less known channels I adore that I want to share with you guys today!

Lydia is just an amazing person as it is, but I love her YouTube channel! She is honest about everything, from the moment she felt like she wasn't good enough to YouTube to the moment she gave her brutally honest opinion on some of the snacks she'd been eating! What's even better about her channel is that it's still relatively new, so you can quite clearly see her progression between videos- as a friend, its a real joy to watch her continuously get better at what she is so passionate about, but as a viewer, it makes for even better watching than before!

Subscribe to her channel here

Nissy Tee
I met Nissy Tee when I trained to be a TV Presenter with YouthMediaAgency. She stood out from the start and has inspired me since the day I met her! She is intelligent, brave, just have to watch her videos! She is honest, emotional, enlightening and just a delight to watch. While she is rising up in the world and chasing her dreams, she still remains humble, which shows in her videos, and I really love that about her.

Subscribe to her channel here

I met Adam (the boy behind sicckm8) whilst filming the first ever live shows on 4Music and have followed him on social media since then. Normally, I'm not into fashion vlogs or videos, but they are quite refreshing coming from a boy, and I really like Adams style too! His Q and A videos are probably my favourite though, he does them pretty regularly and some of his answers really make me laugh! If you're looking for a YouTuber that's totally different from what you're used to watching, check him out!

Subscribe to his channel here

Cattitude & Co.
If you don't know Tara from Cattitude & Co., where have you been all your life?! She's only one of the most sensational bloggers and YouTuber's ever. Writing/talking so openly about sex, vaginas, periods and feminism has really altered how I perceive these things, as well as made me more confident when discussing them. Thanks to Tara, I'm investigating what contraception is best for me, I'm trying to get in touch with my body in regards to my periods, and I am a fiercer feminist than ever before! She's totally awesome, you need to watch her!

Subscribe to her here

Sydney Augusta
Sadly, Sydney doesn't upload videos very often anymore as she's focusing on school and was struggling with the balance, but when she does upload the videos, they are always so brilliant and well worth the wait! Her setting is always brilliant, her lighting is always great and she does lots of 'how to's' and Q and A's, which are my favourite kind of videos to watch. I don't know, her videos are always just really pretty, so I really enjoy them!

Subscribe to her here

Gabriella Lindley
Gabriella Lindley AKA Velvet Gh0st has two channels, Gabriella and Gabriella Lindley. Her channel, Gabriella Lindley, is my favourite. She uploads more regularly on it and there are more chatty videos and P.O. Box hauls which I really enjoy from successful YouTuber's such as herself! Her videos are always so honest too, whether she's drunk or feeling sad or angry about something, she lets it all out for her viewers and I really admire that about her.

Subscribe to her here

Charlotte Doherty
Charlotte's channel has grown quite quickly in quite a short space of time! Primarily a beauty vlogger, she also makes videos on seasonal favourites, anxiety and vlogs too! If you're looking for affordable makeup tutorials (and I mean genuinely affordable, not Vogue's version of affordable) as well as bright, funky hair styles and colours, look not further than Charlotte's channel because she has it all!

Subscribe to her here

Who are your favourite YouTuber's? Let me know in the comments below!

Love from,
Florence Grace


Lessons from The Nightmare Before Christmas

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I don't know anyone who doesn't enjoy The Nightmare Before Christmas, it's such a brilliant film! You can watch it at Halloween, you can watch it at Christmas- in fact, you can watch it all year round! Currently, I'm curled up on the sofa watching it with my sister and I realised that there are some valuable lessons we can learn from the film! Have a read and see if you agree with me...

Everyone gets bored sometimes.
Even when you're the Pumpkin King, life can get repetitive, dull or boring. And that's totally normal. It's okay to change things in your life and switch things up a bit if you want a change from your routine, just like Jack Skellington does! 

Don't give up on your dreams.
Jack wanted to try out Christmas instead of Halloween. At first, he can't quite get it right, he doesn't quite understand how to 'do' Christmas; but he is absolutely determined and so he gets there in the end! Likewise, in real life, you're going to face setbacks, both big and small. However, this doesn't mean that you should give up on your dream just because it isn't easy!

Love hurts.
You don't always end up with who you want to. Sometimes, the people you love break your heart. Sometimes they don't even know you exist. While love is, in its truest form, utterly brilliant, it can be frustrating, nerve-wracking and heartbreaking! It happens to everyone and you'll get through it; everything works out in the end. 

Don't control a woman.
If you try to control a woman, she'll poison you. Simple. 

Things don't always work out.
You might end up hating what you thought was your dream job. You might not get the job in the first place. A relationship might end even though you thought the spark was alive and well. You might buy a car and end up crashing it the next day. Not everything works out, but it's all a part of the learning curve we call life. 

Listen to your best friend.
Okay, Jack and Sally aren't technically 'best friends', but she advises Jack against Christmas from the start, and she was right! Rather than saying "women are always right" (we are, of course), I have gone for "listen to your best friend". Because they know you pretty well and are usually right. 

Don't listen to the doubters.
While I have just said listen to your best friend, at the same time make sure you don't listen to doubters. Obviously if they're having visions of your life bursting into flames, maybe you should. But generally speaking, don't let people's doubts of you and your abilities hold you back. You're capable of more than you think! 

Don't let people tell you who you are. 
You are your own person and you can be whoever you want to be! Don't let people dictate your life to you or try to prevent you from changing. It's your life and you can be who you like. 

What is your favourite part about The Nightmare Before Christmas? Let me know in the comments below! 

Love from,
Florence Grace 

I use social media. So what?


If you follow me on social media, you'll know that for the last four days, I was in Amsterdam. I had the best time, took loads of amazing photos and, of course, shared these online. Because that's what I like to do, you know?

But you guessed it, this resulted in some criticism for using social media/using social media excessively while on holiday. Because apparently that isn't allowed!

So let me just clear a few things up...

I took time off of work
Believe it or not, I did take time off of work for four, full days. I scheduled my blog posts so I did absolutely no writing, I didn't manage the social media accounts I do and I didn't work at all. I took a much needed and, in my opinion, much deserved break for the first time in at least a year and it was great! So there is no need to be concerned that I wasn't enjoying my break, because I was. 

I use social media
I say I wasn't working, I still continue to build my personal brand "Florence Grace" every day, but as this just involves sharing my life online, I don't really consider that to be "working". I post photos and updates about where I am and what I'm doing, and that isn't really a big deal you know. 

I enjoy social media
When it comes down to it, I enjoy social media, particularly Instagram. So when I share photos, it's because I'm passionate about doing it, I like doing it! I didn't sit on social media all day, but if we got free wifi at a restaurant or when we were at the hotel in the evening after being out allllllll day, yes, I would use social media! 

But lastly...
It's really none of your business, to be honest! If I want to use social media on holiday, I'll use it on holiday! If it really bothers you, simply unfollow me! But to sit and criticise me using social media online is just not only unnecessarily nasty, it's pretty bizarre to because why do you even care?! 

I love social media and I use it a lot. So what? 

Love from, 
Florence Grace 

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